100 Things You Can Say to Irritate a Repugligan
From addictinginfo.org, August 2011, fair use.
Conservatives are so easy to anger these days. Even the most insignificant statement can set off their tempers.
If you want to enrage a conservative, I suggest saying the following:
- A Socialist wrote the Pledge of Allegiance.
- Jesus healed the sick and helped the poor, for free.
- Joseph McCarthy was an un-American, witch hunting sissy.
- Jefferson Davis and Robert E. Lee were traitors.
- The South lost the Civil War, get over it.
- The Founding Fathers were liberals.
- Fascism is a right-wing trait.
- Sarah Palin is an ugly cow (said to conservative males).
- The Earth is round.
- Reagan raised taxes eleven times as President.
- Reagan legalized abortion as Governor of California.
- Nixon created the Environmental Protection Agency.
- Ronald Reagan supported gun control.
- Global warming is real.
- Republicans hate illegal immigrants, unless they need their lawns mowed or their houses cleaned.
- The military is a government-run institution, so why do Republicans approve the defense budget?
- The Cold War is over and the Soviet Union no longer exists.
- Paying taxes is patriotic.
- Republicans: Peddling the same failed economic policies since 1880.
- The Republican Party began as a liberal party.
- The Presidents’ full name is Barack Hussein Obama and he was born in the United States of America.
- George W. Bush held hands with the King of Saudi Arabia.
- President Obama saved the American auto industry, while Republicans wanted to destroy it.
- Hate is not a Christian virtue.
- Jesus was a liberal.
- Republicans spend MORE money than Democrats.
- Tea parties are for little girls.
- Public schools educate all children; private schools are for indoctrinating children.
- The Constitution is the law, NOT the Bible.
- Sharia law doesn’t exist in America.
- The President is NOT a Muslim.
- Corporations are NOT people. People are people.
- Fox News isn’t real news, it’s just a racist, sexist, hateful, right-wing propaganda machine.
- The Federal Reserve was a Republican idea.
- Women are equal citizens who deserve equal rights.
- Women control their own bodies.
- Abortion is a relevant medical procedure, just ask Rick Santorum.
- Please use spell check.
- It’s “pundit”, not “pundint”.
- Social Security is solvent through 2038.
- Health care is a right, not a product.
- Roe v. Wade was a bipartisan ruling made by a conservative leaning Supreme Court.
- G.O.P also stands for Gross Old Perverts.
- The donkey shouldn’t be the Democratic mascot because Republicans are the real jackasses.
- Barack Obama ordered the killing of Osama Bin Laden. It took him two and half years to do what Bush couldn’t do in eight.
- Waterboarding IS torture.
- 9/11 happened on George W. Bush’s watch, therefore he did NOT keep America safe.
- Republicans invaded Iraq for oil, so Iraq should be allowed to invade Texas to get it back.
- Separation of church and state is in the Constitution, it’s called the First Amendment.
- Muslims are protected by the Constitution, just as much as Christians.
- Barack Obama is the first African-American President, get over it.
- The Oval Office is NOT a “whites only” office.
- America is a nation of immigrants, therefore we are all anchor babies.
- The white race isn’t disappearing, it’s evolving.
- God is a particle.
- Evolution is real.
- The Earth is 4.54 billion years old, not 6,000.
- The Founding Fathers did not free the slaves.
- The Revolution was NOT fought over slavery.
- Paul Revere warned the Americans, NOT the British.
- Federal law trumps state law.
- The Civil War was about slavery, NOT state’s rights.
- Corporations care more about profits than they do about people.
- Getting out of a recession requires government spending.
- Glenn Beck is a nut-job.
- Republicans: Paranoid since 1932.
- Republicans don’t want to pay for your birth control, but they want you to pay for their Viagra.
- Republicans actually NEED Viagra.
- Fox News is owned by an Australian and has a Saudi prince as an investor.
- Republicans complain about immigrants taking American jobs, then freely give American jobs to foreigners overseas.
- Republicans hate communism, so why do they refer to themselves as red states?
- Labor unions built this country.
- Republicans hold America hostage as a political strategy; the temper tantrum throwing kind of political strategy.
- When Republicans see black, they attack.
- Inside every Republican is a Klansman or a Nazi waiting to bloom.
- Republicans only care about children BEFORE they are born.
- Republicans are hypocrites, they’re just too stupid to know it.
- The Christian-Right boycotts movies that have violence, and then promotes guns and insurrection.
- I think therefore I am NOT a Republican.
- Republicans that oppose gay marriage are most likely in the closet themselves.
- Churches should stay out of politics, or be taxed.
- People are too poor to vote Republican.
- Democrats think for themselves, Republicans form think tanks to do it for them.
- Republicans hate education because they couldn’t hack it in school.
- Greed is one of the seven deadly sins and Republicans wallow in it.
- A little socialism on the Left is better than a little fascism on the Right.
- The current corporate tax rate is the lowest in 60 years, so stop whining about it being too high.
- Republicans: Anti-Gay Marriage, Pro-Lesbian sex.
- Republicans: Terrorizing the American people since 1981.
- Republicans have their own terrorists, just look up Timothy McVeigh.
- Republicans love outsourcing, just ask the Chinese Communists.
- The Republican answer to the oil spill was to apologize to BP, a foreign oil company.
- Democrats will be working hard to bring jobs to Americans, while the Republicans tea bag each other in the middle of the aisles.
- Voter disenfranchisement is immoral and un-American, that’s why Republicans do it.
- Republicans would let your house burn down unless you pay them to put it out.
- Democrats want to take care of the sick. Republicans take their credit cards and then deny them medical attention.
- Republicans say teachers are union thugs, then proceed to rape and mug the entire middle class on behalf of corporations.
- Republicans think rape isn’t a crime, but miscarriages are.
- Republicans are idiots and arguing with them is a waste of time!
Bottom line? If you want to anger a conservative, tell the truth.
Edited By: Alexis Atherton
Email Richard dot J dot Wagner at gmail dot com
IrritateRepgligan.html, this hand crafted HTML file was created August 14, 2011.
Last updated August 2, 2013, by
Rick Wagner. Copyright © 2011-2013, all rights reserved.